Tuesday, September 15, 2009
at
12:30
i think the problem with some people (me included) is that we lack that sort of innate self confidence and that makes us all very self conscious, and to a certain extent, possess a low self esteem.
people like us don't do well with new people, especially if we think that the new people are seemingly more intelligent, better conversation-ists, more good looking etc etc etc. (i.e. people whom we think are better than us) and when we meet those sort of people, we become clams.
honestly i think it's more pyschological than anything. it's more like how we have been accustomed to think. how we perceive ourselves and others. we usually aren't competitive by nature, but we like to compare. we like to compare how we aren't better than others. we don't usually understand why people would want to hang out with us, why would the opposite sex have romantic feelings for us. we don't really take compliments well, we tend to be uncomfortable with that. when you give us sort of people compliments, part of us accepts it because somehow, somewhere deep, we believe that we are THAT person who is being complimented, but we also over-analyse things and start to doubt our qualities.
we only fare better with people we are used to, but perhaps even to those people, we don't present ourselves as the not so confident person we know we are. to them, they will see us as persons whom take life easy, who are so comfortable with themselves, to be able to share a large portions of our lives with everyone. as persons who can adapt to the situations and even make other new people comfortable.
and i guess strength in numbers is the theory behind our behaviour - when we are less uncomfortable, whatever awesome qualities we innately possess shines through and that in turn affects the people ard us, new or old. we feel slightly more confident about ourselves and we know that there are friends to fall back on, so we plough on with the newbies, unafraid to make mistakes or a fool of ourselves.
i guess what i'm trying to say is that i'm this sort of person. i'm not confident, i don't do well with new people, and i'm totally comfortable to be myself with my good friends. BUT i'm not opposed to meeting new people and getting to know them better. perhaps i just need to work on myself more. to be who i am even in front of new people.
often times, i wonder why you guys are friends with me, and i think back to the times when i manage to perhaps touch a little of your lives with whatever that i have to give, i remember the kind words you guys have to say about me and in that, i realised that you guys have also touched mine in so many ways.
so, this is me, almost naked. heh.
thanks for reading!
people like us don't do well with new people, especially if we think that the new people are seemingly more intelligent, better conversation-ists, more good looking etc etc etc. (i.e. people whom we think are better than us) and when we meet those sort of people, we become clams.
honestly i think it's more pyschological than anything. it's more like how we have been accustomed to think. how we perceive ourselves and others. we usually aren't competitive by nature, but we like to compare. we like to compare how we aren't better than others. we don't usually understand why people would want to hang out with us, why would the opposite sex have romantic feelings for us. we don't really take compliments well, we tend to be uncomfortable with that. when you give us sort of people compliments, part of us accepts it because somehow, somewhere deep, we believe that we are THAT person who is being complimented, but we also over-analyse things and start to doubt our qualities.
we only fare better with people we are used to, but perhaps even to those people, we don't present ourselves as the not so confident person we know we are. to them, they will see us as persons whom take life easy, who are so comfortable with themselves, to be able to share a large portions of our lives with everyone. as persons who can adapt to the situations and even make other new people comfortable.
and i guess strength in numbers is the theory behind our behaviour - when we are less uncomfortable, whatever awesome qualities we innately possess shines through and that in turn affects the people ard us, new or old. we feel slightly more confident about ourselves and we know that there are friends to fall back on, so we plough on with the newbies, unafraid to make mistakes or a fool of ourselves.
i guess what i'm trying to say is that i'm this sort of person. i'm not confident, i don't do well with new people, and i'm totally comfortable to be myself with my good friends. BUT i'm not opposed to meeting new people and getting to know them better. perhaps i just need to work on myself more. to be who i am even in front of new people.
often times, i wonder why you guys are friends with me, and i think back to the times when i manage to perhaps touch a little of your lives with whatever that i have to give, i remember the kind words you guys have to say about me and in that, i realised that you guys have also touched mine in so many ways.
so, this is me, almost naked. heh.
thanks for reading!
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